Talk:Four killed in Apalachee High School shooting in Georgia, United States

FBI

Georgia Bureau of Investigation (GBI) can't be the same thing as FBI? @Me Da Wikipedian BigKrow (talk) 00:29, 5 September 2024 (UTC)

Category FBI does or does not need to be applied? BigKrow (talk) 00:30, 5 September 2024 (UTC)

FBI was apparently "on the scene"@BigKrow Me Da Wikipedian (talk) 20:56, 5 September 2024 (UTC)

Note on revision 09:32, 5 September 2024 (UTC)

Hi @Me Da Wikipedian

That's interesting. Maybe shorter articles will make them easier to review.

In the interests of analysing how my reviews work (i.e., timing and processes involved), here is my review log started at 19:17

• 19:19 "The shooting is reported to be the deadliest in recent Georgian history." -> Reported by whom? Can this be changed to active voice.
• 19:20 (having a second read) "Nine others were injured, although the extent of those injuries is currently unknown." -> "Nine others were reportedly injured" [[[WN:Attribution|attribute]] this fact to whoever reported it, i.e., local authorities] ", although the extent of those injuries was unknown at that time, according to the report." (again attribution, you will need to rephrase somehow to not repeat "report" twice in one sentence.
• 19:21 "At least one person has been taken to Grady Memorial Hospital. The victims are yet to be identified." these two sentences are also not attributed in any way.
• 19:21 "According to the Georgia Bureau of Investigation (GBI), the suspect is a fourteen year old student, named Colt Gray, who opened fire in the school's hallway." this is excellent, it has attribution. at what time of day (answers When) did the student open fire? is the weapon known (answers How)?
• 19:22 it would be good to note how many students in total are at the school to compare magnitude of injuries and deaths to the total size of the school
• 19:25 (I've read the two linked sources) the time of day is indicated, but differently, one hour apart. maybe timezones' fault.
• 19:26 a possibly important detail is how the shooter was caught. one of the sources says this. (and how was school evacuated, some timings after shooter caught)
• 19:27 names of victims are provided by sources, but not in this Wikinews article.

Newsworthiness: pass

Copyright: not checked

NPOV: I think this is a 'not ready'

Actions required which I think are making article not meeting NPOV requirement for publishing:

• attribution in several places

Actions strongly recommended:

• clarify weapon and time of day and how shooter was caught

Actions recommended:

• clarify names of victims, post evacuation procedures, size of school, date of court hearing if known

this concludes my review at 19:31

Please make the edits. I'm happy to help if any help is needed.

Regards, --Gryllida (talk) 09:32, 5 September 2024 (UTC)

I think its assumed it to be reported by the source I cited, is it not. Because thats were it came from. @Gryllida Me Da Wikipedian (talk) 22:26, 5 September 2024 (UTC)

@Gryllida also, please use the actual review template next time... Me Da Wikipedian (talk) 22:42, 5 September 2024 (UTC)

@Gryllida anyways another user seems to have solved your concerns so... Me Da Wikipedian (talk) 22:43, 5 September 2024 (UTC)

Hi @Me Da Wikipedian @Wikiwide (thank you for editing!), I would suggest suggest moving "As of 2024, Apalachee High School has about 1,900 students in grades 9–12, with 528 students in 9th grade, according to U.S. News & World Report." sentence to the end of the article, as per inverted pyramid, otherwise looks like all concerns were indeed addressed, I will try to review within the next day. Gryllida (talk) 01:46, 6 September 2024 (UTC)

@Gryllida unless you need to add source you probably could do all of this...or ill do it later today Me Da Wikipedian (talk) 10:53, 6 September 2024 (UTC)

except one, the names of deceased victims aren't listed in the article Gryllida (talk) 01:48, 6 September 2024 (UTC)

The headline needs to include the country. Gryllida (talk) 01:49, 6 September 2024 (UTC)

"when he was not let back in, presumably because the student who went to open the door saw the gun." is a speculation, I've reworded it HERE. I am assuming it is sufficiently minor edit for me to be able to be involved in reviewing. Gryllida (talk) 02:07, 6 September 2024 (UTC)

Review of revision 4796846 [Not ready]

Revision 4796846 of this article has been reviewed by Gryllida (talk · contribs) and found not ready at 02:08, 6 September 2024 (UTC). Copyright: Not reviewed. Please address other issues. Newsworthiness: Not reviewed. Please address other issues. Verifiability: Not reviewed. Please address other issues. NPOV: Not reviewed. Please address other issues. Style: Not reviewed. Please address other issues. Comments by reviewer: Require headline change and first paragraph change to mention US; move last sentence of first paragraph further down for inverted pyramid. Highly recommend including names of killed victims. Otherwise looks good to be published to me. Questions about the above? Ask. If possible, please address the above issues then resubmit the article for another review (by replacing {{tasks}} in the article with {{review}}). This talk page will be updated with subsequent reviews.

Revision 4796846 of this article has been reviewed by Gryllida (talk · contribs) and found not ready at 02:08, 6 September 2024 (UTC). Copyright: Not reviewed. Please address other issues. Newsworthiness: Not reviewed. Please address other issues. Verifiability: Not reviewed. Please address other issues. NPOV: Not reviewed. Please address other issues. Style: Not reviewed. Please address other issues. Comments by reviewer: Require headline change and first paragraph change to mention US; move last sentence of first paragraph further down for inverted pyramid. Highly recommend including names of killed victims. Otherwise looks good to be published to me. Questions about the above? Ask. If possible, please address the above issues then resubmit the article for another review (by replacing {{tasks}} in the article with {{review}}). This talk page will be updated with subsequent reviews.

Dummy heading

Just adding a heading for "reply" link script to work. Seems it dies on the task of leaving a comment after the review template. -- Gryllida (talk) 02:20, 6 September 2024 (UTC)

@Me Da Wikipedian @Wikiwide can you please address the above? It could fit under 5 minutes. -- Gryllida (talk) 19:48, 6 September 2024 (UTC)

@Gryllida done...hows it now Me Da Wikipedian (talk) 10:45, 8 September 2024 (UTC)

Thanks. I was away on weekend and on Monday. Had a long day today. Now I am struggling to rephrase the first sentence to avoid the passive voice. (I think there was a note that article size needs to be at least 100 words, somewhere; by the time the 5Ws get answered, and active voice or some other special requirements followed, the story gets rather stale and/or rather long. How is this supposed to work with only about 100 words?) @Wikiwide @Me Da Wikipedian -- Gryllida (talk) 09:58, 9 September 2024 (UTC)

@Gryllida I've written a story (now deleted) that was barely above 100 words Me Da Wikipedian (talk) 20:41, 9 September 2024 (UTC)

Hm, wonder what'd happen if there was a deletionpedia for Wikinews. Gryllida (talk) 22:56, 9 September 2024 (UTC)

That would actually be a great idea, because it would be nice for anything over 2 weeks old that didnt get published to not be unviewable...for now we could just host it in the Wikinews namespace or something@Gryllida Me Da Wikipedian (talk) 23:27, 9 September 2024 (UTC)

Review of revision 4797148 [Passed]

Revision 4797148 of this article has been reviewed by Gryllida (talk · contribs) and has passed its review at 10:11, 9 September 2024 (UTC). Copyright: Passed Newsworthiness: Passed Verifiability: Passed NPOV: Passed Style: Passed Comments by reviewer: I was involved in editing in what I considered minor edits. Active voice is required. It would be cool to have an answer to "Who" (the shooter) in the first paragraph but there is answer further down. There was a discussion that identifying the victims is not strictly necessary in some regions and I would appreciate an opportunity to explore it further to clarify whether this is a good practice. I did not get a chance to do a full copyvio check other than by reading the sources manually and ensuring the article seems different (there are utilities to check this, which are a bit challenging to access and use). Photos would be nice but this is not a requirement and they may be challenging to obtain quickly. Overall I am happy with accuracy of the written information and the article structure. Thank you. The reviewed revision should automatically have been edited by removing {{Review}} and adding {{Publish}} at the bottom, and the edit sighted; if this did not happen, it may be done manually by a reviewer.

Revision 4797148 of this article has been reviewed by Gryllida (talk · contribs) and has passed its review at 10:11, 9 September 2024 (UTC). Copyright: Passed Newsworthiness: Passed Verifiability: Passed NPOV: Passed Style: Passed Comments by reviewer: I was involved in editing in what I considered minor edits. Active voice is required. It would be cool to have an answer to "Who" (the shooter) in the first paragraph but there is answer further down. There was a discussion that identifying the victims is not strictly necessary in some regions and I would appreciate an opportunity to explore it further to clarify whether this is a good practice. I did not get a chance to do a full copyvio check other than by reading the sources manually and ensuring the article seems different (there are utilities to check this, which are a bit challenging to access and use). Photos would be nice but this is not a requirement and they may be challenging to obtain quickly. Overall I am happy with accuracy of the written information and the article structure. Thank you. The reviewed revision should automatically have been edited by removing {{Review}} and adding {{Publish}} at the bottom, and the edit sighted; if this did not happen, it may be done manually by a reviewer.

Published

Hi @Me Da Wikipedian, @Wikiwide, @Itu, thanks for your help. Congratulations, the article is published now.

You are welcome to make minor edits and they will be reviewed. Major edits can be proposed as corrections.

Please view the article history and the review comments above. (I am surprised how much detail can a story involve. Of course, I wish it didn't happen, as with any crime.)

Please consider writing or editing again in the future when you are free.

Regards, -- Gryllida (talk) 11:11, 9 September 2024 (UTC)

@Gryllida hi, could you please fix the main page. This should be in lead article 1 and lead article 1 should be in lead article 3. The India Cricket story and the US Campaign trail should also replace the Azov story and the hostage rescue story. Thank you. Me Da Wikipedian (talk) 20:29, 9 September 2024 (UTC)

Hi @Me Da Wikipedian, can you do this and I can review/approve your edits or do you lack access? Gryllida (talk) 20:32, 9 September 2024 (UTC)

Sure in a second...I do have access to propose a change but yes youll need to approve it@Gryllida Me Da Wikipedian (talk) 20:41, 9 September 2024 (UTC)

Approved. Thank you for your help! Gryllida (talk) 22:53, 9 September 2024 (UTC)

Could you fix the main page again...I'm getting sick of fixing it after every single article published...@Gryllida Me Da Wikipedian (talk) 22:32, 11 September 2024 (UTC)