Talk:Trump declares victory
Review of revision 4804035 [Not ready]
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Revision 4804035 of this article has been reviewed by Michael.C.Wright (talk · contribs) and found not ready at 15:13, 6 November 2024 (UTC).
Comments by reviewer: We need at least two independent sources for synthesis articles such as this. Since both source articles are from NBC News, we only present their point of view and therefore our article is not written in a neutral point of view. Also please go through the article again to make sure it is compliant with our style guide: WN:Style. For example, we don't use ordinal numbers such as "6th." Images should provide attribution using {{image}}. Categories should also be added. Questions about the above? Ask. If possible, please address the above issues then resubmit the article for another review (by replacing {{tasks}} in the article with {{review}}). This talk page will be updated with subsequent reviews. |
Revision 4804035 of this article has been reviewed by Michael.C.Wright (talk · contribs) and found not ready at 15:13, 6 November 2024 (UTC).
Comments by reviewer: We need at least two independent sources for synthesis articles such as this. Since both source articles are from NBC News, we only present their point of view and therefore our article is not written in a neutral point of view. Also please go through the article again to make sure it is compliant with our style guide: WN:Style. For example, we don't use ordinal numbers such as "6th." Images should provide attribution using {{image}}. Categories should also be added. Questions about the above? Ask. If possible, please address the above issues then resubmit the article for another review (by replacing {{tasks}} in the article with {{review}}). This talk page will be updated with subsequent reviews. |
Further development needed
editI have added {{verify}} to several unsourced statements in the second and third paragraphs. All information must be sourced per WN:Source. I stopped verifying things after the third paragraph.
Also, please provide guidance on the use and translation of the three sources that are in Chinese, which is another requirement of WN:Source.
It would help the review process if you used {{verify}} to indicate the source for every piece of information. If you prefer not to see it in the body of the article, you can use the visibility = hidden switch to make them hidden, in-line citations. See the template documentation for more information: Template:Verify/doc
Heavy Water had indicated they were actively editing the article by using the {{editing}} template. Please work together to make this article publishable. Sheminghui.WU, Heavy Water is a longtime user and reviewer here, whose broad knowledge of our policies and guidelines would be incredibly valuable. —Michael.C.Wright (Talk/Published) 15:19, 7 November 2024 (UTC)
- Thanks Sheminghui.WU (talk) 22:04, 7 November 2024 (UTC)
- Please feel free to modify it Sheminghui.WU (talk) 09:25, 8 November 2024 (UTC)
Using the 5Ws as a guideline
editThe article is still not ready for review primarily due to unsourced statements, including quotes that must be sourced and attributed.
To help develop your first article, it would be good to start by answering the WN:5Ws. Once you have explicitly answered those five questions, you can use your answers to build the lede and headline and from there expand a bit following the inverted pyramid style of writing, with an overall goal of writing a short article of 3-4 paragraphs using 2-3 sources, preferably all in English (there will be plenty of sources available). Using non-English sources complicates article composition as well as the review process.
Based on the current lede, below are my answers to the 5Ws:
Who – Donald Trump
What – I see two: 1. Trump is expected to return to the White House. This partially covers the “what,” but it’s ambiguous—does “return” mean winning an election, visiting, or something else? 2. He delivered a victory speech.
When – When Trump is expected to return to the White House is not answered. When he gave the speech is: November 6.
Where – He gave the speech at West Palm Beach Convention Center.
Why – The “why” is missing from the lede. There’s no explanation for Trump’s anticipated return to the White House or the purpose of the victory speech.
Most of the rest of the article seems to expand on the speech so the easiest route may be for the author(s) to tighten up the 5Ws around the speech.
The full transcript of Trumps speech is available online. If the article will be about the speech, a full transcript should be used and sourced properly to avoid issues of unsourced and/or inaccurate quotes such as the following:
Discussing the assassination attempt and injury he suffered in Pennsylvania in July, he believed his survival was because "heaven wants him to save the country."
That quote should be attributed in prose to who said it and the source for that quote must be listed in the Sources section. I can not find any listed source that mentions "heaven wants him to save the country."
The quote in the same paragraph, attributed to Trump, is also inaccurate according to transcripts I've found online.[1] The inaccuracy could be the result of translation from one of the Chinese sources, which reinforces the suggestion that non-English sources should not be used for this story unless they report something credible not reported by English sources. —Michael.C.Wright (Talk/Published) 17:34, 8 November 2024 (UTC)
Review of revision 4804902 [Not ready]
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Revision 4804902 of this article has been reviewed by Michael.C.Wright (talk · contribs) and found not ready at 16:19, 16 November 2024 (UTC).
Comments by reviewer: The focal event of this article; Trump delivering a victory speech, happened more than seven days ago, which exceeds our limit of WN:Freshness. For this article to become publishable again, it will have to be refocused, a method we call WN:Gatwicking. The guide at WN:Gatwicking explains how to refocus an article on more recent events. Questions about the above? Ask. If possible, please address the above issues then resubmit the article for another review (by replacing {{tasks}} in the article with {{review}}). This talk page will be updated with subsequent reviews. |
Revision 4804902 of this article has been reviewed by Michael.C.Wright (talk · contribs) and found not ready at 16:19, 16 November 2024 (UTC).
Comments by reviewer: The focal event of this article; Trump delivering a victory speech, happened more than seven days ago, which exceeds our limit of WN:Freshness. For this article to become publishable again, it will have to be refocused, a method we call WN:Gatwicking. The guide at WN:Gatwicking explains how to refocus an article on more recent events. Questions about the above? Ask. If possible, please address the above issues then resubmit the article for another review (by replacing {{tasks}} in the article with {{review}}). This talk page will be updated with subsequent reviews. |